"And so it fizzles out, just like that. you open your prized Bollinger to find it flat, its bead gone, the once full flavour escaping the definitions of your connoisseur tastebuds, the liquid once eliciting an unashamed romp through sensations now nothing but unremarkable sparkling water off a supermarket shelf. an anti-climax of your bottled desire. you are trapped in a situation tinged with wasteful regret. an absurd tragedy unfolds with yourself as the reluctant protagonist. time, like a house of cards, collapses at that moment and traps you in a parody of self-constructed foolishness.
But there would always be another bottle. another time."
i wrote that the moment i got home last night, what it refers to you do not need to crack your head to figure out (i doubt you would anyway). yes i am still sore over my paper 3 grade, but not altogether beyond consolation and hope. colllecting the paper just before my exam was a bad mistake for with every word i wrote the abject disappointment seemed to reverberate ad nauseam. to cut the grandfather story short, it felt like fuck lah, the only piece of work i felt i put the most effort in turns out to be the most heart-breaking. but as with all other disappointments to have had the misopportunity to cross my path, i put it aside (and fancy i did quite a good job too).
But there would always be another (39) modules. the result of one term paper is scant vindication to my capability. i know that. and that is all that matters.
and yes, in light of my previous entries, i hope this entry justifies the fact that i am fully adept at constructing grammatical and coherent sentences not punctuated (and accentuated) with vulgarities. no dictionaries, thesauruses and excess brain cells were harmed in the production of this blog post. enjoy the holidays while they last!
My Heart of Darkness.
where the thin line between illusion and reality becomes blurred by the very hand that draws it; where the search for answers lead to more questions; where you have to be broken to be built; where nothing sees miracles but misery. Welcome to my Heart of Darkness.
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