Newcastle 1 Birmingham 5

Abysmal, embarrassing, humiliating, depressing and plain utterly fucked up.

That would be how I would describe last night's loss.

Perhaps the one thing more pathetic than supporting your team by clicking "refresh" on www.livescore.com every 2 min was the sort of performance that they turned in. I admit, I didn't watch the match, but even so I'd doubt playing simple and decent football would put you on the receiving end of such a trouncing. Numbers don't lie. And if those adjectives I've used above are too harsh on a team who gets hammered 1-5 at home by another team a division lower than they are, just let me know.

You would have thought that after more than a decade of supporting the Magpies that I've seen it all - from having a 12-point lead at Christmas blown apart, to having the most talented bunch of footballers in the world such as *drum roll* Guivarc'h, Ketsbaia, Marcelino et al
don the black-and-white stripes... but no. they just have to keep on rolling out surprise after surprise.

It was our worse ever home FA cup defeat since 1914. How's that for a concluding fact?